No turning back for me, and, nope, I'm not that happy bee today. This is my first day at home "smober", and, to be blunt, it SUCKS!
Day 2 was almost way too easy, no cravings, no craziness. Yesterday, Day 3, was a mix of slight cravings and some craziness when I got home and found out my BF is working for the next two weekends again. He is also sick. He doesn't need the money but that's why he's working. So, I just stifle what I really want to say.
Day 4, the beginning...I'm craving but I won't give in. It's gonna be a bad day. My pond...ugh. I've poured so many chemicals in it but it's filled with sludge and leaves I decided to drain it. I did that the year before last. Yuck...it smells even with all the chemicals. I got halfway through and my filter and pumped burned out. They are inexpensive. This is the second one I've had in 8 years. So, I need to buy a pump. Oy, my BF did it before but I've been doing all this myself now. I hate dirty jobs but I did drain the pond the summer before last myself. So, a picture of my pond last summer in July. I'm thinking that a lot of the flowers didn't make it through the winter plus my ivy died that covers the jets. Anyway, July 2006 (you can see the rocks on the bottom...lol...yes, you can):
Now, today June 2, 2007 when the pump was still working :( That's my cart with crap I already removed from it. I know it doesn't look that much different but those are leaves and other stuff you see; not the darned rocks. Ewww...if I got closer, there are dead maggot looking thingies in it and it stinks. It should be about the same color but clear. Hope no one is eating. This pond is a full time job itself. I haven't even started the pool yet.
Off I go to the little hardware store. They sell pond stuff far cheaper than the actual pond store. Of course, there is this underlying anger at my BF because he is now sick and had to take off from his new job already. Dang, I hate doing this stuff myself, and I hate that I haven't seen him in 3 weekends.
On a good note, Megan cleaned the familyroom the other day. It's totally immaculate. She also came home at midnight last night. A friend picked her up as soon as she got home. I haven't seen her since. BAH HAH...it's her last weekend of freedom. Monday is court day. Ok, I'm being a total witch. I'll leave you with some tags to snag or I'll tag em. Don't know who the artist is on the first one and right now I don't really give a rat's behind.
V
V
Warning.....the next tag may be offensive to some. It contains some adult content. You look farther, you've been warned.
39 comments:
Ha, I love the last tag. I hope everything goes well Monday. Good Luck
Hugs
carrie
I can very much relate to going smober - I was a 3 pack a day smoker and quit over 5 years ago. I mourned my best friend (the cigarettes) and was mad at the world about it, lol. But I did it and haven't had one puff in years. You CAN do this. Finding a support group online (I used message boards) is a huge help and go to Silkquit and see if they still have the count down meters - I LOVED seeing those numbers flip!!
GOOD LUCK!!
Stacy
okay, i love the last one with the AC. Can it be tagged with Tina?
thanks and.....I hope your day gets better. it sounds like a very pivotal day. remember that. Each day you make it, the farther away you are from smoking again. and.....i think it is good you have to woke on the pond and pool right now too. that will help.
No, I wasn't eating but I know where to come when I'm on a diet! Your description of the maggoty things ets would put me straight off eating! Lol! I do hope your BF will soon get some weekends free, I know you were none too pleased when he worked the holiday weekend. The snags are great, love 'em all! Have a good weekend! Jeannette xx http://journals.aol.co.uk/jlocorriere05/Welcometomytravels/
I love your pond, hope you et it cleared up. It's beautiful!
The cravings will be bad for awhile, but you'll get through it...I just know you will. Don't give up, even when you think about it...don't! :) It'll be worth it in the end, to be smoke free! WOO HOO!
My gdtr is going to Japan this summer on a student thing, got any tips for her?
Have a great wkend.
Sug
Keep the faith Chris.. sending strength your way, you can do it!!! Love the tags... and the pond.. it's great but like you said lots of work. My sister has one and it's always in need of something. Have a great weekend
hugs
d
WTG on not smoking. I quit 9 1 04 and had a charm made for my bracelet in celebration. You can do it. Your pond looks great. I showed my hubby and said, see, I want that. I would have to do all the work though also and don't want to do it.
Julie
Congrats on not smoking!! I'm proud of ya! I know it's hard. But, you can do it!!
I like your pond a lot. I would like to have one...but I don't want the work that goes into it. But, it sure looks NICE!
Have a good weekend!
Hugs...Pam xoxoxox
Congrats on the smober so far...I wish you well with it...I need to quit...I need to quit...
Love the snags....you are wonderful for sharing.
Michele
Maybe I missed it - But I think your pond is beautiful! I know their alot of work and your not feelin it right now - Sooo Very proud of your 72 Hours of SMOBER! I quit smoking and drinking at the same time- You talk about a woman on a war path! Yikes. You can do this! Know that you can do this! Hope your weekend is a peaceful one! Take care!
Chris, congrats on being snober, I hope Megan's court date goes ok Monday, Hugs Lisa
I would love to make my pond bigger, but I can't imagine all the work. Right now, my little pond is a pain in the butt. I put chemicals in mine a few weeks ago, and it killed all the ground cover surrounding the pond! ARRG!! Have a good saturday.
Missie
I think your pond is cute. and GIRL you can do it keep on not smoking and hang in there. chew some gum or something
The bee is so sweet Chris ,oh well done keep it up ,I mean the weed you smoke not the pond ,it does look nice even though you say it stinks lol ,Iknow just whsat you mean about BF working weekends ,Maurice does shifts ,but its not so bad since I dont work ,Good luck to Megan ,ugh that came round didnt it ? ...love Jan xx
My mom and dad (more my mom's) has a pond, she has about 10 or so fish in it. Chad dug the whole out for it 7 yrs ago, then he put all the rocks around it and mom has of course planted tons of flowers around it too! She and Dad are working on building a waterfall in their backyard, which will go down into a new pond, it'll be really beautiful I'm sure. You're right they do take a lot of work!
God Bless and love the snags! :)
I'm proud of you! Being smober is hard. I don't know how many times I've tried. I would love to have a pond. I've always wanted one. :o) Your's is very pretty. ;o) I would like to know if I could have the Dreams and the Angle tag with Lisa on them? Thank you. ;o) Keep going...Have a great weekend! :o)
Lisa
Lol! Someone isn't a happy camper not smoking! I would love a pond in my yard, It's most certainly large enough for one. Trouble is I barely have enough time to myself now, let alone all the work a pond requires. You should have a sit down with the bf and tell him your in need of some time spent on you. Men are idiots, things like that tend to go over their head unless you put it front of them. (Hugs) Indigo
http://journals.aol.com/rdautumnsage/ravens-lament/
Great job on fighting the urges!! I promise it does go away. Love the pond! Can I please have the angel with Linda on it? Thanks Linda
Keep on keeping on!! You're doing well!!!!
Joann
The pond will look great when you are finished! Linda
((((((((((((((((((HUSTOYOU))))))))))))))))))))Your doing the right thing,we know you can do it.
have a good weekend:) hope you can get the pond cleaned up and running
Deb
That's a pretty little pond that you have!
keep hanging in there okay... It does get easier!
love ya,
carlene
Ponds are hard work, that's why we didn't bother with one lol. snags are lovely.
Debbie
xxx
Love the dreams tag.
Gab
I know how it is to try to stop smoking. One minute at a time babe. YOU CAN DO IT.
Wow, can you send your kids to my house to clean? LOL Every time Megan cleans i lose everything over here.
LOVE YOU
lisa
Cool pics of the pond. Lot of work, but well worth it. Plus, it keeps your mind off of the other things uhum.........Smober, that's the key! :)
http://journals.aol.com/mrsm711/LatteDah/ Tracy
Your pond is beautiful and the hard work you put into it, is going to make it even prettier...
Hang in there on the no smoking...you can do it...I have good wishes on that for you...
Megan was great helping you out. Awesome young lady you raised...many hugs...loved the snags...
Joyce
I love the dancing bee soooo cute..way to go on the 72 hours...keep it up...love your ending tag WTG on the win!! Great job on all...Love that pond too..hope you get it cleaned up...what a job...ewww is right...lol..Have a good day friend! hugs,TerryAnn
Oh... what a hard yucky job... but better to be busy when trying to be smober.
sending you prayers and hugs....
be well,
Dawn
http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/
Good luck with the pond. Can`t really blame you for being upset about the BF .... I mean you work all week, and now he`s not around on the weekends either. Grrrrrr.....
Have a great weekend!
Love ya
pen
http://journals.aol.com/penniepooh/pennys-pieces-of-ohio/
http://www.myspace.com/pennysplace2gogh
Chris, what is the address of the smober journal, i know somebody who wants to quit smoking. or is the journal private?
BTW, I am proud of you for your smober time!
Krissy
http://journals.aol.com/fisherkristina/SometimesIThink
72+ HOURS~SNAGS or TAGS the bee tag and the angel girl tag pleaseeeeee with Sally on them hugsss so much sally
Well done on the smober so far xx Hope it's still going ok x
Jenny
http://journals.aol.co.uk/jmoqueen/MyLife/
You know, Chris, I don't know what happened, but I wasn't getting alerts for this journal. I reset them.. so hopefully that will work. I wondered why I was'nt getting any notices for your other one.. I just figured you were being as bad as me, and not posting much. I'm trying to get better. Maybe now that I have a job, I will have more to talk about! :)
[[[[[CHRIS]]]]]] I am so proud of you!!! You go girl! I know it's tough, but you can do it. Just keep taking one day at a time, and don't worry about tomorrow. It will take care of itself! You rawk!
Love you so much!!
Jackie
http://journals.aol.com/siennastarr/Hopefloats/
GIrl, I'm SO PROUD of you. I KNOW you can do this. IF I CAN FRIGGIN DO IT, I KNOW YOU CAN!!!I may not be able to keep the chocolate away from my face but I have been smoke free goin on 10years. I smoked from 19-43. Like I said before I DID do the wellbutrin for 3 mos but I don't think I needed it. I didn't get it till after 3 days. If you ever need help, email me, IM me. If you want my phone number I'll email it to you. I want you to succeed.
You're a braver soul than I Gunga Din....cleaning out a pond. I don't do gunky jobs. LOL When R slacks off on keeping up with the chlorine on the pool and it turns green I won't even go around the pool LMAO. It's been empty for weeks. Rich is patching the thin spots of plaster & he and the boys are painting the plaster. I'm so excited. The pool is 21 years old. (THAT'S hard to believe!) and we have never had to really do anything to the plaster other than clean the calciu deposit off once maybe twice. They are painting it light blue so I'm real happy about that. I was SOOOO tired of the white. We had this pool put it the summer of 86.Tommy wasn't 5 yet. Lots of kids have peed in that pool. LMAO. Sorry I've turned this into an entry.
You go girl. OH ALSO I forgot...Can I get the bee of course with Queen B on it? And the dreams one with Barb? Thanks my friend. Love & Hugs, Barb
Well this was written on Saturday but I hope you're still doing good. Like I said the first two weeks are pretty rough but if you make it you will feel so good. After 3 1/2 months, my skin is nicer, my hair and clothes smell good, I have more energy, I breath better, etc. etc. etc. I could go on and on with the benefits of quitting.
As for the pond, I finally put some floating plants in mine to keep the sun from building so much algae. Here's what you do....go to the local river or creek and get some lily pads or water lettuces to float in there...they multiply fast. Also, don't prohibit frogs because the tadpoles after they hatch will eat every single speck of algae. I know because I have about a thousand tad poles in my pond right now. lol
Seriously, I hope you're doing good and I'm very very very proud of you for quitting because it is kind of like jumping from an airplane...it's that difficult to do! Love ya! Shelly
Awww Chris I do hope you can continue to stop smoking.It will save you pounds and I think you will do it myself.My daughter tried last month but like you the bad side got to her and she started up again Grrrrrrrrr.I am soory B?F is way from you I do hope things look up on that sdie of your probs.You need support right now and company and when you are working all week I think we look forward to our space together.Ponds I have had in most of my gardens and they are very hard work Chris.How lovely Megan cleaned the family room for you.Soory my comment is late Chris I must have been here snagged the bee and left without commenting .What am I getting like? I am so sorry about that Chris .Just going round the board now knocking on peoples doors to catch up on any unread ones and came across this one of yours.Please accept my apologies for that mistake,I must have been half asleep.Take Care God Bless.Kath
Astoriasand http://journals.aol.co.uk/astoriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES
That is a lovely little pond. I hope it is worth the upkeep! It feels good to be back from the wars reading journals again! Gerry
Post a Comment